Latest Posts

A Beer Haiku

I entered an Instagram contest for a beer haiku: I may be pregnant But will dream of local brews Until I give birth

Rural Town

She’s at the cafe again, sipping coffee, watching her friend sweep the floor while the sun streams through the windows but when she is not looking the trees whisper ill-fated tales of childhood to each other and the familiar wind and snow rage on an empty field steeped in her blood. Every corner of this place […]

Thoughts on Ignorance as a Cause of Post-Partum Depression

I am not a psychiatrist, a medical specialist, or even a scientist, but I have a sneaking suspicion that post-partum depression, while obviously a complex condition, is rooted at least in part in one phenomenon: distorted expectations from lack of sufficient and accurate information. Likely owing to society’s desire to increase the population of humans, […]

Is Your Daughter Going to Be a Slut? Take this Quiz To Find Out!

Desperate to know whether your little princess has a future as a ho-bag or slut in store for her? Take this simple quiz to find out. Keep track of your score for each question. At the end, give yourself 5 points for each “yes” answer, and 0 points for each “no” answer. Did your wife […]

When Your Cat Seems To Be Training You For Children

Our cat Fiona has always taken it upon herself to train Kyle for having babies by waking him up at odd hours, making strange noises, and demanding food at ungodly times. Recently, she has really upped her game. Today, Kyle was gone for work but she must have pestered me for food five times after […]

Furniture Project Part 1

We recently came into some used furniture, courtesy of my parents in-law after they bought new stuff, and we decided to do some painting. We hit up Home Depot and bought some coarse sand paper, water-based primer, and low VOC (baby safe) paint in a pretty, plain white by Behr (called “Ultra Pure White” – […]

Thoughts on an Article I read Pertaining to the Economics of Marriage and Divorce

I recently read The Economics of Marriage and Divorce on FEE.org, which raised some interesting points. The article starts out in an informative manner, and is rightly critical of state meddling, regulation, and intervention in the private matters of marriage and divorce. However, the article goes on to say, Another turning point was no-fault divorce, which […]

Amazon’s Expensive Ass “Baby Bargains”

We do not plan on having our baby shower until early July, but I’ve been browsing items just to get an idea of the various items and gear needed (versus totally not necessary) for Fetus. I’ve been throwing bags full of stuff out recently, and it feels good. It’s not that we don’t have some […]

The New Typical Saturday

Weekends have changed a bit since being pregnant. Waking up late hungover is no longer an option, and since I don’t party all night, I don’t sleep in as much. Even so, I love sleeping in, so it was sort of a big deal that I woke up at 8:20 a.m., drank some coffee, had […]

Exercise

I was largely able to stick to my regular exercise routine during the first trimester. Of course, exercises that were routine before suddenly became monumentally harder, but nevertheless, I was mostly physically capable of doing the same things, including sprinting up hills, steep hikes, the ab roller, push-ups, planks, leg lifts, stairs, lunges, squats, triceps […]

Imagine You’re Standing At the Shore…

I went to yoga again yesterday, even though I needed much more vigorous exercise after eating gummies, chocolates, goldfish, and other unfortunate snacks throughout the day. Toward the end of the session, our instructor had us relax and envision standing at the shoreline of the ocean. She asked us to take in the wide expanse […]

A Reminder to Myself to be Grateful

I’ve read in multiple sources that gratitude is a significant contributing factor, if not the key, to happiness. In a study by two psychologists from UC Davis and the University of Miami, researchers found that writing about things for which people were grateful led to more optimism and positive feelings about the subject’s lives (here and […]

Resurrecting Sin

Sat reflectively in church on Easter Sunday during the sermon and Coveted the Schimmel Grand Piano Envied the violinist dozing off after the conclusion of the worship song Lusted for the brilliant sloth of the begonia and lily arrangements flanking the stage Felt vaguely the deliciousness of silent sin slithering in like the serpent of […]

Can’t I Just Let Her Run Around Naked?

My mother Line’d me multiple pictures of cute baby girl clothing she had purchased recently, noting she was accumulating a collection.   I was digging the forest animal print (rabbits, squirrels, owls), and the onesie featuring multi-colored pineapples, and of course, an outfit with cats (not pictured). I told my mother these were adorable, but […]

Morning Coffee

They held daffodils between their teeth as they wove flower crowns and years later Flipping through old books she found four-leaf clovers pressed between pages Crushed flat and still, preserved for no one She felt the heat and shine of the rising sun and saw her friend in his car, preparing to leave the summer behind […]

Emerald Evening

The boat is aglow with firefly lights and with every slow deliberate breath They are floating past the dock where just a change of mind ago they sat by the fire, kissing cigars While she threw dull smiles at the red flames, unwound unrequited attachments, And left someone else behind in the rainforest daydreams The barge […]

Announcing Pregnancy

Everyone knows the 3-month rule. Due to the higher chance of miscarriage in early pregnancy, many, if not most, like to keep things under wraps until the second trimester. I did not follow this approach for a few reasons, however. While the risk of miscarriage in known pregnancies is, according to Dr. Google, 10-20 percent in […]

The Post Office by Charles Bukowski

I recently read The Post Office by Charles Bukowski, and I haven’t decided whether it is an ingenious work of dark comedy or an over-hyped hipster anthem (like Kerouac’s On The Road – don’t kill me). The Post Office is narrated by Henry Chinaski, a drunk degenerate who works at the United States Postal Service as a carrier. He is […]

Medical Technology: The Cure For Pregnancy Paranoia

Just a brief note on ultrasounds. I’ve had 3 at this point, and I am grateful for medical technology, because I am prone to worst-case-scenario horror fantasies of the most paranoid sort. I’m usually pretty good at quickly and rationally talking myself out of these, but nevertheless, they can intrude upon my more logical thoughts […]

More Thoughts on Pregnancy and Work

Telling Your Boss My office is a small, boutique operation, with my boss “Bossman” being the partner, and me being his right hand man… er, woman. Thus, I knew there was no way I could abide by the 3-month pregnancy announcement rule at work, even if I wanted to follow such a rule. That would just […]

“We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars.” -- Oscar Wilde

五花馬,千金裘, 呼兒將出換美酒, 與爾同銷萬古愁。